Moving In With Your Partner

June 26th, 2013
Posted in Moving Tips

So you’ve been in a relationship for a while now (or not, I don’t judge) and you and your partner have decided that it is time to take it to the next level: living together. This may seem like a good decision at first, but there are an infinite number of ways everything can go horribly wrong. Making relationships work is all about communication and compromise. Here are some tips to consider if you are committed to making the new aspect of your relationship work. After all, you can no longer storm out and go home after a fight since your home is his/hers as well.

Rules

Rules are important. You would set it for roommates, so set it for your partner as well. It will lower both of your frustration. If no one is allowed to touch your sugar bowl, make sure he/she knows. If tradition dictates that there are no shoes in the house, make sure your partner understands and respects that. Also remember that it is a two way street so they will have rules you have to adhere to as well.

Independence

This should probably be considered before you two move in. How independent are you? Do you like having alone time? If so, consider looking for an apartment with an extra room. It can serve as a game room or office or whatever you want. That way, you’ll have somewhere to escape to if your partner’s constant presence is starting to suffocate you.

Both Names on the Lease

No one wants to think about the financial aspects or the ‘what if” scenario, but it would be foolish not to. With both names on the lease, you won’t run the risk of being kicked out if the relationship does not end well. The same goes for bills. That way, one partner won’t be saddled with the responsibility of paying for everything. You are both accountable for the bill.

Chores

You do not want to be slaving after your partner and cleaning up when they have just been inspired by Iron Chef and turned the kitchen into a hurricane of chopped veggies, spilled sauces, and scattered spices. Nor do you want to be stuck with bathroom duty month after month because your partner doesn’t realize the bathroom needs constant cleaning. Split up the chores around the house. Who takes out the trash? Who washed the dishes? Who hoovers?

Communication

The most important skill that will be used once you’ve moved in together is communication. It is easy to get annoyed with the fact your partner keeps putting the cumin powder in the wrong cupboard. It is also easy to dismiss it and keep the annoyance to yourself because it is so small. But eventually, it will build up and something as small as misplaced spices can cause a fight. Everyone has their quirks, but the whole point of moving in together is to co-exist. So talk to each other.

Differences

Acknowledge your differences and what it will bring to your new home. Maybe your partner has a secret obsession with glittering uniforms. Maybe it’s an extensive collection of superhero figurines. Whatever it is, you’ll have to find a way to make room for it just as your partner will make room for your likes and interests. You may like one show and they do not. Either way, you are both different people and compromises will have to be made.